


The Devil's Lamb

by xxxRosebudxxx



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angels, Angst, Angst and Feels, Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, BDSM, BDSM Scene, Biblical References, Birth Control, Bisexual Female Character, Bisexual Male Character, Bisexuality, Blindfolds, Blow Jobs, Body Image, Bondage, Canon Universe, Casual Sex, Character Development, Complicated Relationships, Cunnilingus, Demons, Depression, Developing Relationship, Dirty Talk, Dom/sub Undertones, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/F, F/M, Fat Shaming, Feminist Themes, First Time, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Friends With Benefits, Hand Jobs, Handcuffs, Identity, Internalized Misogyny, Kink Negotiation, Light Dom/sub, Light Masochism, Light Sadism, Loss of Virginity, Mental Health Issues, Mild Kink, Misogyny, Multi, Mythical Beings & Creatures, Mythology - Freeform, Open Relationships, Oral Sex, Orgasm Control, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Orgasm Denial, POV Female Character, POV First Person, Porn, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Praise Kink, Public Sex, Queer Themes, References to Depression, Rough Sex, S&M, Seduction, Self Care, Self-Acceptance, Self-Discovery, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Hatred, Semi-Public Sex, Sex, Sex Toys, Sexism, Sexist Language, Sexual Identity, Sexual Violence, Sexy Times, Shameless Smut, Slut Shaming, Smut, Social Anxiety, Submission, Submissive Character, Supernatural Elements, Threats of Rape/Non-Con, Threats of Violence, Threesome - F/F/M, Threesome - F/M/M, Unhealthy Relationships, Vaginal Fingering, Virginity, Voice Kink, sexual awakening
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-10
Updated: 2019-01-19
Packaged: 2019-09-15 15:37:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 17,655
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16935942
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xxxRosebudxxx/pseuds/xxxRosebudxxx
Summary: Rachel Bloom has been waiting for the right person, so long that she's fed up, and goes out seeking it for herself. She so happens to try her luck at the LUX, the hot nightclub owned by the Devil himself Lucifer Morningstar. Does she get what she came for? Oh yes, and even more. :3 What starts off as a one nightstand turns into an odd but intriguing friendship with The Devil and the demon Mazikeen, with lots of kinky sex and other adventures.





	1. Greatest Desire

**Author's Note:**

> **This is my first time sharing my more adult writing work, if you have any tips I'd love to receive them. I don't have the details of the plot worked out very well, though I do have a descent idea of the themes I'd like to explore such as sexuality, identity, shame, bodily autonomy, and relationships.**
> 
> **All sex in the narrative is consensual. However sexual violence and other types of abuse are some of the more important themes but will never be graphically depicted. Only alluded to, details of aftermath, threatened, and maybe snippets of mild physical violence (all framed as bad of course). Sensitivity to these subjects varies for everyone, there is no shame in this not being the story for you. Shit will get real, but the subject will be handled sensitively to the best of my ability, should I make a misstep please don't be afraid to tell me. I will listen.**
> 
> **May the story begin...**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **The following chapter contains sexual harassment, manhandling, fat shaming, internalized misogyny, and semi-public oral sex.**

I shiver as I wait in line to get into LUX, one of the hottest clubs in LA and where all my girlfriends had told me stories of amazing hook-ups. That's what I'm here for, or at least hope for. I haven't exactly planned this out in advance, I was home all alone with nothing to do and couldn't stand it anymore. So I threw on my favorite club dress, my white one that exposes a few inches of my mid-drift. I wore splashes of red to go with it, from my heels, my lips, and my clutch purse. I thought I looked good in the mirror before I came here, but I can't help but feel I look desperate. Ugh! Focus Rachel! I'm nearly at the entrance now. I probably should've brought a friend, but what would I have told them? Hey you wanna help me get laid tonight? They'd be shocked to hear that from me, and need an explanation, which I just don't have the energy for. I need to do this alone, whether I succeed or fail. I got my mace should I need it, and I'll be vigilant in keeping good watch on my drinks.

"ID miss?," asks the doorman.

I hand him my driver's license, he nods as he looks me and it over before he hands it back.

"You meeting someone?"

"Oh yeah, my date is waiting for me inside!"

I said that about three octaves too high, making it an obvious lie. Why did I lie though? Because men can go to a club by themselves and no one blinks, but a woman alone seeking sex? Pathetic. Not that I think that of my fellow women! I just, despite knowing better I can't help feel there is something...wrong with me? I'm going to be twenty-nine in six months, and I've barely done anything. Least the doorman doesn't look like he's judging me.

"Go on in, have a nice night," he says, with a kind smile.

"Thank you," I say, nervously as I walk in.

Inside I already feel overwhelmed at the sheer amount of people everywhere, and the loud music. Yeah I can't do this without a drink first, maybe two. I head straight for the bar, where a gorgeous light skinned Black woman in leather is making drinks. I try not to make it obvious I was just admiring her looks as I take a seat.

"What you wanna drink?"

"Vodka cranberry with lime please."

She gets to making the drink, and I think I catch her looking me over? I avert my gaze to the dance floor, at all the people swaying to the music, and several grinding against each other. I'm so envious, it's been a long while since I danced publicly. Dance is one of the few ways I can really be free.

"Here's your drink."

"Thank you," I say, immediately taking a gulp.

"Hmph," she chuckles, flashes me a knowing smile before tending to the other patrons crowding the bar.

She must see folks with my agenda every night? I take a more restrained sip of my drink, and continue watching the people dancing. In the middle of the club is a piano on a pedestal, but no one is playing right now. Just typical club music tonight. I think my friends told me the owner likes to play for the patrons often.

"Hello, is this seat taken?"

I look to my right, it's an alright looking blonde guy with a beer in hand. I straighten my posture and try to make a confident smile. I got this!

"Not at all," I say, careful to speak with a normal pitch.

"Thank you," he takes the stool beside me,"so what's a woman like you doing here?"

"Oh you know, just...looking for a fun time," I say, sipping of my drink.

Wish I could just cut to the chase, but don't want to scare him off either. He nods, also taking a sip of his beer and his eyes travel up and down my body. Good, we want the same thing.

"You look beautiful."

"Why thank you," I say, smiling through my blush.

"You're so brave wearing such a tight dress at your size."

I-did he really just say that to me?! Was that a neg?! My interest in him instantly deflates. Suddenly he snatches my cranberry vodka right out of my hand before I can react, and sets it with his beer back on the bar counter.

"Lets dance," he says, grabbing my wrist and pulls me toward the dance floor.

I nearly make a nasty fall off my stool, though fortunately land on my feet okay. Who does this guy think he is!?

"Woah, hey stop," I protest.

"Come on, it'll be fun," he insists, trying again to pull me forward.

He's gotten aggressive in just a millisecond, how do I handle this? Tell him to fuck off? What if that just provokes him further? Play nice about it? What if he just sees that as a yes? There is no real right way. I'll try nice first.

"Please let go of me," I plead, trying to pull away from him.

He just scoffs and smugly looks down at me. I remember now why I haven't been touched, because of guys like this. God please, get me out of this.

"Hey! She doesn't wanna dance with you!" shouts the bartender.

Bless you, gorgeous bartender! You're an angel!

"Yes she does," he says, still trying to pull me.

Being nice didn't help me, fighting back it is than. I'm about to smack the creep when suddenly, a tall dark haired man in a stylish black suit appears behind him.

"What's all the fuss here?" he asks, an attractive British accent rings through his words.

He has a smile across his face, but his eyes stare down upon the creep ominously as he towers over him. When their eyes meet, the creep immediately steps back and releases my wrist. Finally! I'm so thankful to have two strangers step up for me.

"N-nothing, she's just nervous about dancing." he stutters.

"No, I just don't want to dance with you," I state, firmly as I rub my wrist.

"Well that settles it than," says the Englishmen.

"I'll leave," the creep says, like he's asking for forgiveness, and turns to leave but stops in his tracks, for the bartender block his path.

"Maze here will show you the way out."

She smirks as she takes a picture of him with a phone, and then grips him roughly by his arm.

"Hey! I-ow!"

She practically drags him out of the club, must be a hell of a lot stronger than she looks. I look up to my savior, the owner of the place no less. The ominous look in his eyes has vanished, they now gleam with roguishness as he watches the creep being thrown out.

"I'll see that he's permanently banned from every bar and club in LA. Are you alright dear, did he hurt you?" he asks, his voice smooth and gentle.

He silently gestures to take my wrist for a check, his manner is completely disarming I reach it out for examination. Cupping my hand, while the delicately feeling his fingers along where I'd been manhandled. I wince a bit when he presses down a little.

"It's just sore, be fine by tomorrow, thank you, " I say, taking back my hand.

"If you insist and don't mention it, I detest charmless brutes. Thousands of years since creation, and there are still plenty of them plodding the earth."

I smile, nice to be reminded there are at least a few men that get it. He's extremely handsome too; tall, dark hair, dark eyes, with a strong jaw, and scruff. Smells good too. I wonder...no don't be ridiculous. I haven't got a chance with a man this good looking. I should just leave with what dignity I have left.

"Thank you again, anyway I should go home," I say, shyly and turn for the exit.

His hand gently lands on my shoulder, it's so soft and nonthreatening. I look back meeting his dark eyes, and they instantly draw me in. 

"Wait now, who says you can't have any fun because of him?"

"It was just stupid for me to come here."

"Why exactly did you come here?"

He steps closer to me, making our faces just inches apart. The man must be at least a whole foot taller than me. My attention is completely taken like I've been alone in a dark cramped room and he's suddenly opened a door bringing in long absent light. He's waiting for me to come into that light, with his hand offering to guide me there. 

I can't stop the truth just rolling right off my lips, and I don't want to stop it either.

"For sex," I said, with affirmation.

His eyebrows perk and his voice gets saucy,"What's so stupid about that?"

"I...I'm ashamed. I've never, I haven't."

"Ah there it is, I'm surprised, can't be for a lack of opportunity," his eyes glances up and down my body,"No, certainly not and you clearly desire it."

He, he finds me attractive? I'd be blushing if I wasn't so surprised. Well not that no one is ever interested in me, just not usually guys that look like him. 

"It's not about religion, marriage, or even love. I just, I just never felt safe. No one has ever made me feel like I could just let go. No one I could trust."

I can't believe I'm telling him all this like it's nothing. All that anxiety and shame that held me back has evaporated.

"I see, I forget sometimes how fragile humans are, and how that can lead to hesitation," he says, the sauciness dropped and now carry a tenderness to each word.

He really does get it, though that was an odd way to say it. I have to ask him, I have to take a chance or I'll regret it forever.

"I would love it if it was you," I blurt out.

Mischief flickers in his gaze, and a clever smile draws wide across his face.

The sauciness in his voice returns "really? Well...I do delight helping people realize and indulge their desires."

The bartender Maze returns, "That man won't be coming back."

I stare at her, like earlier but without the discretion. My eyes wonder and linger on her. She's got a unique scar that cuts through her left brow, silky dark wavy locks, and the smoothest bronze skin. 

"I want her too," I blurt, again.

My shame comes rushing back, slapping my hand over my mouth. That's something about myself I wasn't aware of until saying it out loud! Jesus Christ! Maze, she's not even fazed by what I said. She just looks me over like I'm a juicy raw steak.

"I could certainly help you with that," she whispers, right against my ear.

A shiver runs up my spine, and releases warm ripples through my brain. This is happening, this is actually happening!

"Yes this lovely lady is looking to be plucked and interested in us doing the plucking."

"Mmmm, I do like corrupting," she whispers, again in my ear.

Her hand snakes around my back and settles on my hip. She's bold, and aggressive but unlike with the guy earlier I don't feel in danger. Well there is a little sense of danger, but it's thrilling and enticing. I want to run to it, not away from it. He steps over to the other side of me, also whispering seductively in my other ear.

"What's your name love?"

"Mmmm, Rachel."

"It's a pleasure to meet you Rachel, Little Lamb. My name is Lucifer, and you already know Maze. Would you like to go upstairs to my apartment with us?"

That can't be his real name, whatever I don't give a shit.

"You won't hurt me?"

"Not unless you want us to," says Maze.

I'm officially hot and bothered. I want them, I want them both right now. That metaphorical hand Lucifer and now also Maze that reach out to me, I must take them. Take me away from this cold and dark place that is my fear and shame!

"Yes, take me upstairs," I say.

"As you wish."

Lucifer entwines his fingers in mine and leads to an elevator while Maze stays right at my side holding me by the hip. Once we're inside, and the doors close, I can't wait anymore. All these years I've closed myself off, and all the reasons for it somehow don't matter anymore. I turn to Maze, and pull her in for a passionate kiss. The warm ripples in my brain grow into hot waves crashing through every limb inside me. She grabs me by both hips, presses me hard against her and intoxicates me with her mouth.

"Getting started without me," muses Lucifer, his chest up against my back as he moves my red hair to expose my neck.

After taking off his suit jacket, he kisses my shoulder gently, then runs the tip of his tongue slowly up my neck to my ear.

"Ah!" I gasp, from his teeth nibbling my earlobe.

I reach my arm over his neck, I want to kiss him too and he obliges. His kiss is a touch more tender than Mazes, slow open mouth kisses, then his tongue peeks in hesitantly til mine welcomes him in. His tongue is long and intermingles in perfect rhythm with me. I'm getting wet.

"Mmmph," I moan, running my fingers through his hair.

I can feel him trying to contain a satisfied smile as he keeps frenching me. The elevator door dings again, and opens to a luxurious apartment, but I don't think they don't plan to bring me inside just yet.

Maze works kisses and bites my neck, greedily tasting my skin, and then she moves down, along the way down till she's on her knees. Is she? Yes she is, her hands slide up from my calves, my thighs, and under my dress til her thumbs hook my panties. She stops, I break the kiss from Lucifer to look down wondering why. Her mischievous grin tells me why, she wanted me to watch, she rips them right off me with ease and smells the tatters in her hand.

"You know what she wants," Lucifer whispers, hiking my dress up till my dripping pussy is exposed.

My legs begin to tremble as Maze spreads them open, and Lucifer's arm wraps around my waist.

"Hehe, been awhile since I had an all natural," she said, referring to my pubic hair.

She presses her nose into the hair, and deeply inhales. Mmm, I want her to get on with it already! I quiver as her fingers spread my labia open. This is torture! She flashes me one more smile, and then engulfs my pussy in her mouth.

"Ahh! Fuck!" I scream.

My whole body wants to burst into flames, sweet Jesus her tongue feels unbelievable! I'm grinding my hips without even thinking about it.

"You enjoying yourself," says Lucifer, not actually asking.  
"Hmm uh-huh, hahh oh," I whine, frantically nodding.

"Say it, say you love her eating your pussy."

"Ah! I love her eating my pussy!"

He quakes against me, then crashes his lips to mine, ravaging the inside of my mouth. Oh he's grinding himself against my ass now. I feel his hard cock. I can't stop moaning.

Maze slides a finger inside me and pumps it in and out. I can't muster the strength to stand anymore, Lucifer's arm around me is the only thing keeping me from collapsing. She slips in another finger, stretching me out as she spreads them apart with each thrust inward. It doesn't hurt, my body is so completely relaxed in their hands. Lucifer stops kissing me, and tentatively watches my face as I writhe in his hold. He moves his free hand over my breasts and pulls down the straps of my dress and bra to free them. I squeal as he pinches my rock hard nipple. I'm about to go over the edge.

"Oh, I'm so close!"

"Yeah you want cum for us?"

"Yes!"

Maze adds a third finger inside me. Pumps hard and fast. Spirals the tip of he tongue over my clit. I'm coming undone.

"Cum," he orders.

"Hah, da-"

Not another noise can make out my lips. My back arches sharply, one hand clenching the roots of Lucifer's hair, and the other clenching Maze's too. I...I have never cum so hard!

Maze stops licking me, and takes out her fingers, caressing the hood over my clit through the after shocks rippling through me. My mind is completely at a blank and my arms fall limp at my sides as I pant heavily.

"Think you might have overdone it Maze, I'm not sure she can handle the next round?"

Maze chuckles, licks my juices from her drenched hand and stand up.

"She can, just give her a few minutes to put herself back together".

"Ha, ha yes," I pant.

I want more. I need more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **If you enjoyed this chapter please give me Kudos, Bookmark, and maybe leave a comment if you like! I love constructive feedback, and to brainstorm with fellow writers. If you're a fan of the Lucifer TV series, how did you like how I wrote the canonical characters? What do you think of Rachel so far? How'd you like the dialogue? What works? What doesn't?**


	2. Exploration

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Rachel, Maze, and Lucifer continue the sexual escapades they started in the elevator in a proper bed.**
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> **Contains a threesome with dirty talk, cunnilingus, fingering, multiple orgasms and intercourse. ******

Lucifer lifts me into his arms bridle style, carrying me into his penthouse, as my sense of balance was out of commission at the moment. I’m no where near thin, yet he carries me with such ease. Maze walks ahead as she removes her leather crop top, and next her pants. My eyes linger on her slender nude body, I really can’t comprehend this gorgeous seductress just ate me out and even more was about to be done to me.

“Like what you see,” she says, looking back at me.

“Yes, you’re so beautiful.”

“I know.”

I respect a woman who knows her worth. Lucifer dips his head in for another kiss from me, mmmm bringing back up my arousal. He effortlessly multitasks, keeping contact with the kiss and carrying me up a few steps to his bedroom. Maze situates herself on the bed, laying on her side, and propping herself by her arm. I am laid down beside her, and she immediately takes my chin for a rough kiss. I can taste the saltiness of my fluids in her mouth. So hot! Lucifer watches us, and slowly takes off his clothes. She bites and tugs my bottom lip. By tomorrow my lips will be so bruised and swollen. The thought of such visible evidence of this night excites me. 

My hands haste to explore her skin, eager to caress every erogenous zone and feel her respond to me. First, I touch the nape of her neck, drifting just the tip of my fingers against it. She smiles against my lips, though I’m not sure if because it pleases her, or she’s amused by my amateur efforts. I refuse to give up! Next I slide down her shoulder to her wrist, turning so I can feel the inside of her arm, and gently tickle up and down. She stops kissing me, and leans back still smiling. I pause, confused by her stare.

“Why are you stopping Little Lamb?” she asks.

“Oh sorry, I wasn’t sure if you didn’t-“

“I will tell you if something displeases me. Now continue.” 

I’m not sure what I want more, her, or to be her? Both. The answer is both. I do as she says, and continue stroking the radius of her arm, her assertive eyes locked to mine. I also kiss her neck, try a nibble, and run the tip of my tongue up to her ear.  
“Mmm,” she purrs. 

Yay! She likes that! I lick her earlobe then carefully nibble. 

“Harder,” she orders.

“Maze likes it rough,” chuckles Lucifer.

Is he naked yet? Guess he enjoys the view. I take a good chomp of her lobe, and a real moan escapes her lips. It’s delicious, I want to hear more. I move my hands to her breasts, they’re smaller than mine, their shape reminds me of cupcakes. Again, start with just my finger tips, circle around her areolas, and to her nipples. She sports a clever grin, but no noises. So I pinch them, her smile grows, still not a peep. I kiss my way down to them, and suckle with my teeth. 

“Good, but could be better,” she says. 

Frustrated I bite, hard, I nearly break skin but stop myself. 

“Nah!”

She rolls onto her back, brings me with so I’m on top of her. I deviate between massage and pinches, while sucking hard. 

“Hehe, yes like that,” she laughs, between moans.

“Such determination to please,” says Lucifer, as he finally joins us in bed.

He unzips my white dress, I’d forgotten I was still wearing it. I lean back and shiver as I take my arms out of the sleeves. He peels the rest down my thighs, guiding me to hover over Maze to remove it off my legs. My red heels are still strapped on, I reach to take them off but he waves his finger.

“No, no, keep them on,” he says, unhooking my bra.

At last, I am entirely exposed. I am filled with joy to have my desire fulfilled. Not many have a first time like this, with a man, and a woman. Or even have an orgasm, and I strongly suspect I’ll be having another one and maybe more. 

Lucifer rubs my thick thighs tenderly, and up to my ass.

“Iye!” I yelped, as he squeezes both fatty cheeks.

“Don’t neglect Maze now, “ he whisper, massaging further.

Maze! No I mustn’t let her go unsatisfied! I practically smother her in a kiss, like it’s a desperate apology for forgetting her. She briefly returns the kiss, then claps both hands on the top of my head and guides me downward. She…she wants me to do for her what she did for me in the elevator. What if….what if I’m no good at it? I tremble again as I make my way there, to her vulva. I was so bold and determined a minute ago, but the thought of giving oral sex triggers some serious performance anxiety. But I do want to do it!

“Hey,” whispers Lucifer, gently taking my shoulder,” Look at me”. 

Maze lets go of my head. I stop and turn to meet Lucifer’s gaze. His dark pools draw me in as they did earlier downstairs, again somehow his gaze communicates I can tell him anything without shame. 

“What is frightening you?”

“Being bad at it,” I quiver.

“Awww, so sweet. I can give you some instruction if you like….but we can also stop.”

Relief washes over me at the assurance, it’s exactly what I needed to hear. 

“Maze, won’t be upset with you. We can focus on your needs right now, and when you’re done I’ll take care of her. That is an option. We can also just stop altogether too.”

I am not going to cry, I refuse to cry! And I manage to stop any tears from forming and take a deep breath. I know I do want this. 

“I want to, will you?”

“Gladly, though I won’t be instructing with words,” he says, and flashes a positively devilish grin. 

What does that mean? 

“Maze, here,” he says, arranging pillows. 

I move off top of her, she moves up the bed and props herself at an angle. Then he stands up and walks around to the opposite end.

“On all fours Little Lamb, that’s it, now go to Maze and bend over with that magnificent ass up high for me.” 

I crawl to Maze, who spreads her legs for me. My face is just inches from her pussy now, I can’t contain a smile when I see her pubic hair in the shape of a lightening bolt. 

“Hah,” I gasp, Lucifer just spread open my labia and lightly blew on it. 

I realize what he meant about instruction without words. My hands tremble just a little, however, I know I can do it. I spread Maze open just as Lucifer did me, and mimic blowing on her. 

“Mm,” she moans, and bites her lip. 

This is so erotic. Lucifer takes a single long lick from my entrance to my clit, his tongue is surprisingly pointy. Naahhhaa, focus! Focus! I do the same to Maze, and she runs her fingers through my hair as she moans. She tastes sweet. My pussy swells. He does the same thing again, this time staying at the clit lapping at it softly. It sends tiny electrical pulses, from it up through my spine and my ass twitches. Lucifer chuckles and the vibration against me makes me twitch even more. I do the same for Maze, with a giggle, and she responds to that as well. She even laughs too. All three of us laughing is like music to my hears. 

“See, things don’t need to be so serious,” says Lucifer, as he fills me with a long finger. 

“Ah, yes,” I sigh, rocking myself to take his finger in deeper. 

I dip my index finger into Maze too, oh she’s so wet it slides right in with ease. She watches me tentatively, her piercing gaze both intimidates and arouses me. This balance of her assertiveness, and his reassurances spoils me. Both intoxicate me. Lucifer moves his finger in a circle motion inside me, and again I twitch when he hits that bundle of nerves, I’ve never been able to reach on my own. My G-spot. Oh joy! I circle inside Maze’s wet walls, and she shutters. I hit it! Yes! Then Lucifer grinds his finger right in that spot again, like a pestle and my vagina a mortar. 

“Oh fuuuck,” I mewl, electric shocks of pleasure zap through my whole body. 

It’s gets difficult to not just get lost in the pleasure at this point, but Maze, I want her to feel this good with me. I meticulously do the same mortar and pestle motion to her.

“Yes, right there,” she moans, thrusting her hips forward. 

My eyeroll back as another finger is added inside me and adds more pressure to the spot. I pant through the incredible sensation, staying focused on my task, and add another finger myself. Again, she thrusts into the grinding of my fingers, and her walls are throb. 

“Hmm, you’re holding out so well. Tell me, have you practiced holding back your orgasms alone,” asks Lucifer.

“Y-yes!”

“I thought so, mmgh,” he murmurs. 

There’s a slapping sound, he’s getting himself off with his free hand. I want to look, I haven’t gotten a good view of him naked. I’ll get a chance after I finish Maze off. Lucifer works my g-spot in the same motion and pace in what feels like forever, building up my pleasure while I'm building up Maze. Then suddenly faster, and my thighs tremble uncontrollably. My pants turn to cries, but I hasten the pace of my fingers too. 

“Oh yes, that’s good, don’t stop,” Maze moans.

Lucifer’s fingers work even harder now, I-I’m getting close again. My hand shakes and it’s rhythm is erratic, not controlled anymore. Maze doesn’t appear to be displeased with it though, as she takes a finger to her own clit. Her head bends back, she’s almost there too. I want to make her cum. I must make her cum. I scream as Lucifer uses, twists his fingers, hooks his fingers into my g-spot firmly, and uses his thumb to caress my clit. Barely I manage to twist my fingers too, though it lacks the grace his movements have. Yet Maze arches her back, and shutters, her fluids spurt all over my hand. Holy shit. But I can’t drink in the moment, as Lucifer mercilessly uses his thumb still loving my clit to make me join her. My entire-body spasms, and I see fucking stars. 

“Jahhh, aahhhhh,” I wail, collapsing on my side.

A couple tears escapes the corner of my eyes. I have now had two of the best orgasms of my life and got someone else to cum on my first try. Lucifer’s bare chest presses against me from behind, soothingly rubs up and down my waist to thighs. 

“Well done Little Lamb,” he whispers, and kisses my neck.

I grin, his praise fills me with such pride. Maze shifts so we’re face to face, I’m snuggled between them now. She takes my wet hand and points my fingers to my lips.

“Taste me,” she orders. 

I enthusiastically suck on each digit, savoring her sweetness. I love the way she locks eye contact with as I do it. So damn memorizing. Hypnotizing. Lucifer takes my other hand and gradually guides it down to his hard penis, wrapping my fingers around him. Oh my! It feels big, or I least I think, I’ve got nothing to compare it to? What if it’s too big? I instinctively try to stroke him, so hot in my hand. 

“Mmm, would you like me to fuck you?”

I nod. I want him inside me. He smirks, pecks me on the cheek, and rolls off the bed. Huh? Where is he? Oh! He opens a nightstand draw, and takes out a condom. Yeah I…should have thought about that. Maze crawls back onto the pillows and motions for me to lay against her, on my back. My head rests on her shoulder, and she cups my breasts, they’re big enough that her hands can’t fit them completely. I’ve got large droopy cantaloupes. Lucifer returns to the bed with us, the condom on his hard penis, and a bottle of lube in his hand. Speaking of his penis, I’m relieved to see it’s not as big as I thought it was. Just maybe a couple inches longer than average and maybe a bit girthy, thankfully. 

“Eep!” I squeal, as Maze reaches over and hooks her arms under my knees, and bends them back to reach my shoulders, leaving me wide open for Lucifer.

Lucifer squeezes out a bit of lube onto his fingers and inserts them into me. 

“You’re already very wet, but better to be safe than sorry,” he says, his other hand stroking my inner thigh. 

He finishes lubricating me and proceeds to climb on top of me. His body is like a classical Greek statue, an icy shiver runs through me. But then his dark eyes meet mine, and that shivers turns into the coziest warm blanket. 

“Are you ready Little Lamb?” 

“Yes Lucifer,” I whisper, and reach to cup his scruffy jaw. 

He gives me a sweet smile and leans in for a gentle kiss. For someone who calls himself Lucifer, he is awfully thoughtful and kind. Least in bed. I feel his cock poking against me, and my eagerness overpowers my anxiety. 

“This shouldn’t hurt, not after all we’ve done this far. But if it does, please tell me and I will stop immediately.”

“He means it, and he would never lie, ever,” Maze whispers. 

“Yes…thank you,” I sigh.

“Haha, don’t thank me just yet,” he whispers, sensually in my ear and kisses me one more time.

Then he positions himself at my entrance, keeping intense yet comforting eye contact with me as he slides slowly in. I bite my lip, I feel so stretched just from the tip! Though it doesn’t hurt, a little uncomfortable but it doesn’t hurt. He halts, giving me a chance to relax and adjust to his girth. I deeply inhale and exhale, leaning my head back. The discomfort slowly leaves my body.

“Keep going,” I breath.

He continues, still very slowly filling me. It’s so much more than the fingers, so much deeper! My head is fuzzy. When he’s all the way inside me, he pauses again for me. 

“How do you feel,” he asks, his forehead on mine.

“Stretched and…full,” I say, my voice breathy as I blush. 

“No pain?”

“No, none. Please, please move.”

He carefully pulls about half way out, and then just as carefully back in. Oooah, it feels pleasant as he just brushes against my spot again. 

“Nnph, that feels good,” I whisper.

He chuckles and does the motion again though doesn’t pick up the pace. I watch his face, not a hint of struggle to control himself. How can anyone have this much discipline? I mean obviously everyone should be considerate enough to not harm their sex partners, unless that’s what they’re into-I-damnit! I’m just never seen a man not even fazed! He makes holding back look easy, it’s like he’s not even human. 

“How are you so in control,” I ask, in a pant.

“I’m the Devil,” he whispers, smoothly.

I laugh, guess I’m not getting a real answer. That’s ok, not exactly my main priority at this moment. I place my hands on his shoulders as he begins to just barely pick up the pace, building my pleasure. But he suddenly stops when I reach around his back, and touch what feels like scar tissue. Maze stiffens under me too. Did I do something wrong? Lucifer takes my hands and moves them to his lower back. They both relax again. 

“I’m sorry,” I say.

“It’s nothing, just please don’t touch there again,” he says. 

I nod, looking into him trying to signal I understand and respect his boundaries. However, he doesn’t want to linger on the matter, and distracts me by further guiding one of my hands to his ass. It’s a very nice one, I give it a squeeze. 

“Mmm,” he moans. 

He thrusts into me, deliberately hitting upward to my g-spot again, but slow, agonizingly slow. All the discomfort has vanished. He’s just torturing me with pleasure now. Devil indeed. My walls just readily accepts him inside, and it cries out for more. 

“Hah, ah, oh Lucifer.”

“Yes mmm, you like the way I fuck you?”

“Y-yes, hmph, do you like fucking me?”

“Haha, mmm yes being inside you is heavenly,” he moans.

He fucks me faster, at a steady pace and still hitting just right. I feel my cum leak out from around his great cock, my pussy is melting. Yet he is still slower than I would like, bastard. 

“More! Ahhh, I can handle it!”

“Grugh, what a temptress, you want it that badly? Hah.”

“Yes! Please Lucifer! Fuck me hard!”

He rams into me, fast and hard as I want. Fuck! That’s it! Maze chuckles, releases my legs, and fondles my breasts. I instantly wrap my free legs around Lucifer, I want to feel his skin to mine. He wraps his arms around me, I hold tight onto his shoulders careful not to touch those scars again. Feeling both his and Maze's skin to mine is the most serene sensation, like my legs freshly shaven against silk.

“Lucifer! Lucifer!”

“Ooaah, yes scream my name!”

His voice is taking me, my limbs begin to spasm again. 

“Nah, Lucifer, I’m going to,” I scream. 

“Cum for me,” he groans, and slips a hand below to rub my clit. 

That does it for me. My nails dig into his skin, as I erupt so hard my thighs cramp. Pain mixes with pleasure. I bite into his neck through the orgasm. He shudders, and cums right after me. My arms and legs slump onto the mattress, exhausted. My eyes close, sleep is calling to me. I feel Lucifer kiss my brow, as Maze combs her fingers through my hair. 

“I think that’s if for her tonight,” he muses. 

“Indeed, she was a nice morsel, though I’m far from tired,” Maze chimes, shifting out from under me. 

“Neither am I, let’s get her comfortable first,” he says.

“Why? I like her sprawled out, all exposed like that.”

“It is a lovely sight, still, Little Lamb might get cold.”

I hear a scoff. They’re moving about the bed, pulling the covers down from beneath me, and rearranging pillows. Someone pulls me up and rests my head on a fluffy pillow, then tucks me in. The warmth of the blankets pull me further into dreamland, I barely make out what they’re saying.

“Happy now?” Maze scowls.

“Yes, now come here demon.”

I hear laughter, and then sleep takes me completely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you folks? Does this ring true? Well, as true as escapist smut can be? If you have any critiques to give, I'd love to read them. What do you think works, or doesn't work? I love creative discussion.


	3. Tom the Shitbag (no smut)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rachel awakes to find the thrilling night of pleasure she had wasn't a dream, and fresh coffee. Unfortunately she doesn't have much time before she has to go home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *****CONTENT WARNING*** This chapter contains stalking behavior, slut shaming, verbal abuse, threats of physical violence, and self defense from said threat.**

The warmth of sunlight on my eyelids rouses me awake, I expect to be back in my own bedroom but…no, everything I did with two total strangers last night was real. I lay in black silk sheets, on a huge comfortable bed and, I reach around, it’s just me here. Where did my seducers go? I open my eyes, ergh it’s bright. I sit up, look at my surroundings. I didn’t pay much attention to Lucifer’s apartment when they brought me here, I’m not so distracted now though. This place is unique. The furniture is so modern and sleek, the walls to my right are all windows. The shape of the room is angular, there’s a flaming orange leather armchair at the end facing the bed, my dress, bra, and purse are laid on it. I bet Lucifer enjoys watching from that seat. I look at the wall behind me, is that brimstone? There are odd statues carved into the stone, deities maybe? It looks ancient. 

“Are you awake,” calls Lucifer, from the other room.

He pops his head in from the archway to my left, wearing a small silky black robe and a glass of whiskey in hand. Drinking first thing in the morning says a lot, though he doesn't seem drunk or even tipsy. I nod bashfully, I got fucked by this handsome man just last night. My first time too. 

“Hmm, complicated one are you? Shy yet feisty at the same time.” 

“Hehe, yeah the feisty bit doesn’t usually show itself,” I say, slipping my hair behind my ear. 

“I have that effect on people, and so does Maze. Would you like a coffee?”

“That would be great.”

He sleeks off, I slip off the bed with the sheet wrapped around me. Ow, I wince! My body is tender and sore. Eek! Nearly trip. I’m still in my heels too! I step out into the living area. That…that is an impressive bar he has set up, like damn. It’s glass ceiling high shelf filled to the brim with expensive looking liquor, and backlight in a warm orange glow, like fire. The living furniture is the same color. There’s a beautiful grand piano. On the opposite side of the room from me is a huge collection of books, practically a whole library in Victorian shelves. The walls have panels of that same ancient looking stone in the bedroom, with sections in some foreign language. Honestly, I dig the whole aesthetic. 

“How do you like your coffee,” he calls, from some other room.

“Lots of cream and sugar,” I holler.

I hear some clinking of a spoon, and he comes back with coffee. 

“Thank you,” I say, taking the mug.

“Your welcome, for the coffee and for last night,” he says, with a wink.

“I’d call you arrogant, if it wasn’t true,” I sigh, with a satisfied smile as I sip my coffee, ouch, aaand my lips are sore as well,” where is Maze?”

“Ah, she left after her and I finished. Doesn’t like to share a bed, least not for sleeping.”

Yeah, she didn’t seem like the cuddling type. I remember her comments I overheard before I past out. I’m not insulted, I’m aware of how one-night stands typically go. 

“So, is she your girlfriend?”

“More like minion.”

I look at him with my eyebrows crunched, he is an odd one. Minion also seems a bit demeaning? He puts a hand on the small of my back and guides me to the couch. Crosses his legs as he sits next to me. 

“I take it you’re single?”

“Yeah, I just broke up with my ex a couple months ago,” I say.

“Would his name happen to be Shitbag?”

I blink in confusion, I say, “I…I’ve been calling him that privately in my head, how did you?”

He took out my phone from his robe pocket, the screen showing I’ve been getting endless texts and calls from Shitbag, as he’s listed in my contacts. His actual name is Tom. Why does Lucifer have my phone?

“Your phone kept going off in the night-you’re an impressively deep sleeper by the way- I just turned off the ringer. Couldn’t help but notice the colorful name.”

The blood rushing in my cheeks is a combination of embarrassment, and fury at my ex. However, I remain calm as I take my phone. 

“Sorry about that.”

I scroll through my texts a little:  
12am: Rachel, you awake? I miss you. Please talk to me  
12:02am: Rachel I need you. I love you.  
12:07am: Wish I could touch you. Kiss you.  
1am: Fine. Bitch.  
9am: Rachel I’m coming over for my games I leant you.  
9:21am: I’m here, you asleep?  
9:33am: You staying at Hannah’s? Where are you? Pick up your phone.  
9:50am: Really?  
10:05am I’m not leaving till I have my shit back. 

…It keeps going, it’s 11 am now. Another text from him pops up. Fucking Shitbag. 

I quickly text him, “I’ll be there within half an hour. Calm down.” 

“Does he do that often,” Lucifer asks. 

“Yeah pretty much since we broke up, anyway I need to go before he throws a tantrum,” I say, guzzling down the rest of my coffee and standing up.

“Your things are on the chair in the bedroom, except your underwear, I’m afraid Maze kept the tatters of those for herself.” he says, with a mischievous grin. 

I’d forgotten about that, guess I get to go home commando. Set my mug down on the coffee table, I use a coaster like a good house guest. Then head back to the bedroom to get dressed, throwing the sheet back on the bed. Lucifer followed me, I can feel his eyes admire my body as I get dressed. Makes me both self-conscious and flattered, I need to work on my body image issues. After I get on my boob cage, my bra on I slip back into my dress. Er, have trouble with the zipper, I look back at Lucifer.

“Need some help,” he says, his eyebrows perking.

I nod, and he strolls right up behind me. He zips me up at a snails pace, his free hand slips beneath the fabric to graze along my spine. Feels lovely. 

“You know, we could have a quickie before you depart,” he whispers, saucy in my ear.

His offer is tempting, I imagine him bending me over on this chair and taking me right now. Yeah, hmph nice. Holding up Shitbag longer is also appealing. Then my phone vibrates, urgh, I need to get home. There is nothing fun about making him angry, when I have to face him when he’s angry. 

“I…I would, but I really need to go and I’m a bit sore from last night,” I say, a little breathy. 

He finishes zipping up my dress and removes his hands from me. 

“Very well, I already got an uber for you waiting outside.”

I turn to face him with my eyebrow raised.

“You were going to make the driver wait?”

“Oh, I would have paid them extra for it.”

“Nonetheless, I really need to go,” I say, awkwardly pat him on the arm and walk past him. 

“Wait.”

I halt, what does he want? 

“Should you be interested in some more fun, here’s my card,” he says, and slips said card in my hand. 

I take a look at it, black with his name-if it’s real-in gold,” Lucifer Morningstar.” The last name is a nice touch. If I didn’t have to go I’d inquire about the name. I’m surprised he’s giving me this, granted he’s not asking me out just offering future sex.

“Thank you, I’ll consider your offer,” I say, putting it in my clutch.

I see my wait out, when I reach the elevator I look back. He’s watching me, with that same clever grin, like he knows I’ll be back. Though I’m not sure myself, I was only looking for one night. The thought of having more of that…like I said, I’ll consider it.

“Farewell Little Lamb,” he sings, with a graceful wave of his fingers. 

I’m thankful my uber driver isn’t a talker, I need to think about what I’m going to do when I get home. Tom…Shitbag, is waiting for me. I’m already tense just thinking about it. Now it’s a video game he wants back, last time it was a T-shirt, and before that some movies. All of which were gifts, they only became loans after I broke up with him. How many things is he going to want back till he leaves me alone? Let’s just get this over with.

When I get there, I can’t move out of the car. He’s waiting for me right outside the apartment building, standing at the door. Staring right at the car. My driver looks at me with concern. 

“You ok honey?”

“…Yeah, how much do I owe you,” I sigh.

“It’s taken care of.”

I get out, and his eyes widen as he sees me. Deep breath. Get the keys out of my purse. I march ahead, with my head up high. He meets me half way, he like most people is taller than me. 

“Where have you been,” he scolds, up close in my personal space.

“Out,” I say, striding past him for the door. 

“Out? All night? You never…”

His jade eyes hyper focus on my lips, and neck…I imagine I have maybe a love bite or two. Didn’t think to look in a mirror before coming. If I wasn’t scared, I’d be smug about my exploits. 

“You…Rachel, did you have sex?”

“That is none of your business,” I say, with a shaky voice.

I’d wanted to sound stronger than that. We’re in the building now, and he’s stalking after me the whole way down the halls.

“None of my business!? We’re together for two years and you never so much as-“

“Keep your voice down Tom,” I hush, going up the stairs. 

“Why?! Afraid the neighbors will know you’re a slut!”

That word cuts into me like a rusty razor blade, especially it coming from him. I can’t stop the hot tears forming in my eyes. I speed up to a jog, when we reach my floor I’m practically running, and he won’t let up. 

“Who!? Who was it!?” 

I reach my door, my hand trembles trying to get the key in the lock. Fucking come on! 

“Who!?” he shouts, his fist slams on the door.

My heart is pounding in my chest, as my eyes widen at his fist only a couple inches from my face. The key finally goes in and I unlock the door, throw my purse to the side and Tom stands in the doorway. But he doesn't look like he's going to stay there, no he looks like an angry bull ready to charge. "Tell me who Rachel!" he spits. He takes a single step forward, and I just grab the nearest object, an old small and plastic dance trophy I chuck at him.

“The Devil! The Devil and his Minion fucked me!” I scream, I scream so hard it hurts.

He flinches when the small trophy hits him in the face, I just grab whatever else I can and keep throwing shit at him. I just don’t care, I just want him out! Shitbag’s face is utterly stunned.

“And I loved it!”

I throw the last thing as hard as I can, and then charge at him, adrenaline pumping through me like fire. I shove him to the ground. 

“Now get out and stay out!”

I slam my front door and lock it. Next I…I just stand at the door, paralyzed. Cold sweat runs down from my temple to my cheek. I don’t know what came over me, I just couldn’t take it anymore. Don’t hear anything from the other side for what feels like ages. Until I hear a grunt, and some joints pop as he stands up. 

“You’ve really lost it Rachel,” he scowls, stomping off.

My heart drops, and I drop to the floor with it as his steps grow distant. Thank God, he left. My knees give way and I land on the floor with a thud. A silent sob chokes in my throat, as the hot tears turn to an endless stream. That Shitbag. That fucking Shitbag! Hah, hah I can’t believe I pushed him like that? I don’t know what came over me. I was so upset, so sick of him invading my life, and then he had the gal to call me that…I just snapped. And now I’m coming apart. I hug myself tight as I tremble and sway. Whimpers slip through each deep breath I take. I need to calm down, so I seize the muscles in my pelvic floor like Dr. Martin taught me. Hold for 10 seconds as hard as I can, and release…whooof, the trembling stops. I’m ok. I’m ok. One more, I squeeze again hold longer this time and release. I can stand now, and do so, then head for the bathroom. Shower. Need to shower.

I just strip off my clothes to the floor as I walk, and step into my small bathroom. Grab a fresh towel and wash cloth, turn the water on to the highest heat setting. I need to feel scalding hot water, I don’t turn on the fan, I need the steam too. Dry skin be damned. 

“Ahhhhhh,” I moan, as the water hits my skin. 

So good, perfect. I wash up quick, so I can just sit on the floor of the tub, and get lost in the searing heat. I stay there, just roast myself till the hot water runs outs and get a good wake up call when it runs cold. I get out, turn the fan on, and open up the high up window. I don’t normally waste water like that, but I needed it. As I towel dry my body, a layer of skin erodes off, bits of the shavings sticking to my arms and legs. I suppose I should make up for treating my skin so badly, I grab my lotion and lather up all over. Treat my face with toner, and face cream. Take my meds. Brush my teeth. The mirror clears up, and I take a good look at myself. My lips are swollen with a bit of bruising, actually got a cute pout to them. I sketch my neck, yep I got a couple hickeys too. One on both sides. One from each lover. 

Do I feel different? Am I a different person now that I’ve had sex? Sex with two people I don’t know?...Am I a slut? I never liked it when women got called that. I know some embrace the term. I had felt like someone else when it was happening. No, not “happening”. It didn’t happen to me. I did it. I did it, and I liked it…loved it. I was someone I’ve always wanted to be, someone free.

I put on my robe, and went to the living room. My purse is on the floor, I take it and dig out the card Lucifer gave me. Reading the number over as I slump into my lumpy couch.

Perhaps I will call him up for another fun time, but first I think I'll talk to my therapist about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **I hope my content warning at the beginning of the chapter was efficient enough to emotionally prepare you readers, if I could have done better both with the warnings and how I depicted Rachel's fight with her ex, please tell me. I would greatly appreciate it.**


	4. You like jazz? (still no smut)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *****CONTENT WARNING: Therapy session where Rachel is nearly faced with a hard truth, don't worry it ends on a light and fun note. Promise there will be smut in the next chapter. ;)*****

“So, how have you been since our last session?” says Dr. Linda Martin, my therapist as I sit across from her.

I like her office, it’s color palate is warm and earthy, the sun spills in perfectly through the windows. Been seeing her for about two years, she knows more about me than most. Her attire is always office professional, glasses, and her pretty blonde hair always put up. Oh boy, she’s in for a surprise. The swelling in my lips has returned to normal since that night, the hickies are still there but I’m wearing a black turtle neck to cover them. 

“Uhh, well…a lot has happened…a lot of firsts,” I say, twirling a finger through my hair.

“Really? Well that sounds great, you’ve been wanting to put yourself out there more, I’m glad you’re taking steps forward.” She says, a proud smile across her face. 

“Haha, more like leaps,” I say, with a nervously laugh.

“Really?”

I lean back on the couch, hold myself close. How do I tell her? I’ve told her about my frustrations with sexual intimacy, but never about taking action about it. Let alone a threesome. Will she be concerned at my impulsiveness? 

“I see you’re feeling some conflict about it?”

“…I had sex.”

There is a split second silence from her, eyes grow wide and then relax back.

Then she says, “Well…that’s unexpected.”

“Yeah, it was,” I say, looking at the window away from her eyes.

“So, when did you do this? How do you feel about it?” she asks.

“Two nights ago, and like you observed, I’m conflicted.”

“Why do you think that is?”

“It was something I just decided to do on the fly.”

“Ok, what prompted it? Tell me what happened.”

I lean forward, resting my elbows on my knees, and clap my hands together.

“I…I was at home alone…again, with nothing to do and no where to go on a Friday night. Bored, and also anxious about getting another call or text from Shitbag. Angry that he can do that, ruin my day just from the sheer anxiety of him possibly calling or showing up unannounced. I don’t know, I was just so fed up with it all. So, I…dolled myself up and went out looking for sex…I don’t think I was expecting to actually get it.”

Dr. Martin’s eyebrows are perked as she nods her head,” but you did.”

“Oh I got more than that.”

She looks at me attentively with a tilt of her head, anticipating my next reveal. 

“I had a threesome, with a man, and a woman. Yeah turns out I’m into women too.”

That one gives her some pause, some surprise, but no signs of judgement.

“Alright, and did you,” she makes a motion with her hands like they’re scales,” enjoy it?”

“I came three times.”

“That…that is impressive. So you went out to get what you wanted, got it, and enjoyed it. So what exactly do you feel conflicted about?”

“I don’t know, I…don’t feel regret, the guy gave me his number and I’ve thought about calling him for another night actually. I guess…I just am worrying over how other people might react? I’m surprised you’re so chill about, frankly.”

“Rachel, I’m not here to be your judge, I’m here to help you understand yourself. And, more importantly why does anyone have to know? You’re an adult, how is it anyone else’s business?”

Her questions are rhetorical obviously, and yeah she has a point. They almost make me feel better, almost release me from my sense of shame…then I remember someone else already knows what I did.

“It isn’t, it’s no one’s business. But uh…Tom knows, he was at my place when I got back the day after. I uh.”

I pull down my turtle neck, revealing the faded but still present hickies on my neck. Tears welp up in my eyes as the image of shock and disgust when Shitbag saw them goes through my mind. I immediately wipe them away, and I refuse to let anymore form. Just focus on getting to the point. 

“I take it he didn’t react to seeing those well?”

“Uh yeah, he called me a slut and practically chased me into my apartment.”

Dr. Martin straightens in her seat, “Chased you? He chased you?”

I nod, then explain all that happened. The rage in his face, how he slammed his fist near my face, and how I just snapped via throwing shit at his stupid head. 

“Ok, forget the sex for a minute. I am much more concerned to hear Tom’s behavior has escalated.”

“Oh no, no, he just got angry in the moment. You got it all wrong, I’m the one that threw a bunch of crap at him!”

“But you just told me how scared you were when you did that. Rachel you were defending yourself,” she says, her voice low and soft.

The muscles in my arms stiffen, she makes it sound like he was going to hurt me. Tommy is a Shitbag, but he couldn’t, wouldn’t hurt me. He just misses me. I don’t want to talk about it anymore. I stand up, holding my purse close to my chest. 

“I need to go, I need to uh meet my friend,” I say, with a stutter. 

“Wait! Rachel!” she pleads, standing up too.

“I’ll see you same time next week Dr. Martin,” I say, making quick wide stride for the door. 

She doesn’t follow me, thank goodness. I just needed to talk about the sex I had to work out the feelings on it and got it. Hearing her say it, “no one’s business,” was exactly what I needed. Didn’t need anything else. I know what’s next, I know what I want. I take out my phone as I get out the building and toward my car. Dial the number I’ve been wanting to call for two days.

“Hello Lucifer Morningstar at your service,” he greets, his British voice smooth and saucy as I remember. 

“Hi Lucifer, this is Rachel, we met a couple nights ago,” I say, opening and getting into my car.

“Ah, what can I do you for? Though I’m sure I already know the answer.”

“Hmph, how about some dancing and we’ll see about what else we can do as the night goes on?”

“Dancing? At LUX than?”

“Yes.”

“Show up anytime Little Lamb the doorman will let you right in, no need to wait in line. I look forward to dancing with you.”

“You too,” I say, and hang up. 

*****************************************

Later that night I show up at the LUX close to ten, in a sleeveless purple turtle-neck body suit, with black flowy shorts that have fashionable suspenders. Just as Lucifer said the doorman lets me right in. It’s Sunday night, not the best day of the week for a night club, and yet the line to get in is still packed. As I step inside I see Lucifer is in the center of the room, at his piano, with everyone watching him as he plays and sings an old jazz standard. It Don’t Mean a Thing, written by Duke Ellington and Irving Mills in the 1930s. It’s maybe THE most famous jazz song, even if someone doesn’t recognize the name they’ll likely recognize by ear. I had walked in just when Lucifer was warming up the piano before singing, his fingers dance on the piano the way only a true master's fingers can.

_It don't mean a thing  
If it ain't got that swing_

Hips just move on their own to the music. Mm, I love jazz. Love just about all music, but jazz isn’t exactly played on the mainstream these days. Last time I got to dance to it with other people, was a recital when I was 15. Everyone watching is just standing there, such a crime too, this is a song meant to be danced to! Lucifer’s got a great voice for the style too.

_doo wah, doo wah, doo wah, doo wah  
Doo wah, doo wah, doo wah, doo wah_

He’s got so much life and energy, there are some people trying to sway to the rhythm but don’t quit know how. That’s it, I’m dancing! I do a boogie forward move down the staircase, careful kick forward, step right, brush left, and step left. Wiggling my finger as I descend in a “no, no,” motion. Good thing the stairs aren’t filled with people to trip over. A couple people look at me curiously as I move to the music. 

_It don't mean a thing  
All you got to do is sing_

I’ve reached the floor now, I’m tapping my feet Charleston style with a vigorous sway of my hips not traditionally done with the dance. Can’t help it, the music makes me. Kicking my legs up as high as I can without hitting anyone. The people around take notice and step back, giving me more room to swing arms and legs as dramatically as I want. More are looking at me, some are even trying to mimic my movements. 

_doo wah, doo wah, doo wah, doo wah_

“Woah, she can dance,” someone says.

_Doo wah, doo wah, doo wah, doo wah_

Lucifer turns his head as he sings, and his dark eyes spark with glee at the sight me dancing. His fingers on the keys pick up the tempo and speed, and I take the que to match his pace. Transition from Charleston to broken fish tails, with side steps, and pops of my hips. Step, pop. Pearls of sweat form on my forehead. Step, pop. 

_It makes no diff'rence  
If it's sweet or hot_

I keep the steps and pops moving close to him, with an added shimmy of my hands forward up to over my head and shimmer down both sides. Lucifer and I never break eye contact, beaming at each other the whole time.

_Just give that rhythm  
Ev'rything you got_

I keep my dance around the piano now, the whole club is watching us both, and many are copying simpler versions of my moves. Yes! Dance! God I’ve missed this!

_Oh, it don't mean a thing  
If it ain't got that swing_

The song is almost over, time for a shim sham to finish it off. Step out, slide back, repeat right left and right left. Waving my arms with snaps of my fingers, bounce to my shoulders, and bend my knees with all the jive I got in my soul. Sweat is dripping off my face.

_doo wah, doo wah, doo wah, doo wah  
Doo wah, doo wah, doo wah, doo waaaaaah_

Lucifer finishes with a flare of his fingers along all eighty-eight keys of his piano, while I leap with a long twirl in the air. I hear him laugh with joy as I stick my landing with my hands outstretched, and panting. The entire club erupts in applause and whistles. 

“Yes! Thank you! Thank you!” he hollers, with a bow. 

Then he gestures to me,” and how about our dancer!” Roars and whistles kiss my ears so deliciously, as I too take bow. Then the normal club music plays, and everyone disperses to continue their evenings.

Lucifer steps down from the podium, and steps toward me. 

“I wondered if you were going to show off your skills tonight, though I wasn’t expecting it quite like that. I’m impressed and appreciate a fellow jazz lover.”

“You…you knew I was a dancer?” I say, still panting. 

“Oh Little Lamb, how could I not after feeling this body of yours,” he muses, hands take hold of my waist gently. 

I slide my hands on his and up his arms, all the little hairs on my skin standing up with excitement at his touch. 

“Under that fluff, you’ve got the muscles of a professional,” he whispers, into my ear.

“Ugh,” I moaned, with an eye roll. 

He blinks, taken aback, “Pardon?”

“Just call it fat Lucifer, no need for euphemisms to spare my feelings. Fat is just a matter of fact.” I say, shaking my head.

He smiles again, “I see, my apologies. Won’t happen again.”

“Now, you said on the phone you looked forward to dancing with me?”

“Oh very much, especially after that performance. May I have this dance?”

I giggle at the formal gentlemen way he asked and shake my head yes. A sly smile crosses his lips, and suddenly takes my hand, lifts it up and spins me in a fast twirl. He stops me, with my back turned to him, and presses against it. Laughter escapes me again, guess I’m not the only dancer here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **I'd just like to let ya'll know I'm not a dancer, so if any of you are or least have some experience in the dance world feel free to inform me of any mistakes I made, I did minimal research on jazz and jazz dancing to depict Rachel believably.**


	5. Colors Revealed in the Dark

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rachel and Lucifer rinse each other off in the shower after dancing, along with other more exciting activities. :3 Afterward they talk a bit about Rachel's dancing career.
> 
>  
> 
> *****CONTENT WARNING: The following chapter contains oral sex and intercourse. Discussions of mental health, allusions to suicidal ideation, fat shaming, and disordered eating.*****

Lucifer was a talented dancer on top of being able to sing, and play piano, a triple threat. Maybe quadruple, if you count his skills in bed? He danced with me like it was foreplay, hands gracing every erogenous zone that was publicly acceptable as we grind against each other. We’re both pretty sweaty, by the time he escorts me off the dance floor to the elevator that went up to his penthouse. I pounce on him the moment the elevator doors close as I pull him by the collar for a kiss. I taste brandy on his lips. His fingers hook under my suspenders and go down grazing the sides on my breasts. A solicitous quiver escapes me. 

“What you say we rinse off in my shower?” he whispers, between kisses.

I nod. All that dancing was quite a work out, and I don’t care for the way my body suit is sticking to me from the sweat on my back. Ick. We keep kissing, tips of our tongues teasing much like the dancing we did in the club. I unbutton his shirt, and he pulls down my suspenders. 

The elevator opens to the penthouse, and he takes me by the hand to guide me to his bathroom. My eyes widen when he opens the door in, it’s like stepping into one of those old gothic cathedrals in Europe. The tub sits in the middle of the room, stone pillars along all four corners, and black iron candle stands too. Of course, the tub, and other appliances are all modern. To the left the wall is just one huge window overlooking LA, I assume, and hope are tinted. The shower is the most marvelous to me, its doors are all stain glass, and inside so are the walls with back lighting. 

I strip off my clothes quickly, I want to get in that shower! Lucifer has an amused smirk on as he watches me.

“What?” I ask, kicking off my shoes.

“I just enjoy seeing such eagerness.”

I giggle, feeling myself blush,” It’s different with you, like I’m still me but a me that’s been hiding.”

“Precisely,” he says, taking off his shirt.

I’m already naked and am not waiting for him. I step into the shower it’s like entering a whole other realm of colored glass, and then Lucifer hits a switch. It’s dark now, except the subtle lights behind the glass, and illuminate all the different colors on my skin. I can’t contain my gasp, beautiful. Lucifer enters, closing the door behind him, making the colored lights brighter in the darkness. I want to ask him how much this all cost, this all had to be custom made. But that can wait. He steps over to a control panel, it’s light up color makes it blend in so well with the surroundings I didn’t realize it was there till now. Hot water descends upon me from above, hmmm perfect temperature. Enough to sooth the muscles but not too hot that I’d be peeling a layer of skin off like a snake by time we get out. 

Lucifer wraps an arm around me from behind, with a wash cloth in his other hand gently scrubbing my shoulder down my arm. No need for soap, it’s just a rinse off. We take our time leisurely washing each other’s bodies, with teasing caresses, and kisses. As if the build-up from dancing wasn’t enough, but this isn’t like my first night, I’m not built up from years of frustration I can take my time here. When we’re both properly rinsed off, I place my hands on his shoulders and push him down to the seat in the shower. I situate myself on my knees, on the floor in between his legs. He’s semi hard and I see he’s uncircumcised. I didn’t get the best look at it last time, I got to briefly touch it and when I did see he had a condom on. 

“Lucifer, will you instruct me on how to please you?”

That tint of mischief gleams in his eyes again, as he tucks my red wet hair behind an ear, and then traces along my jaw to my chin. He tilts my head up a little, and leans over to kiss me, roughly with his tongue dominating mine. Arousal flares in my stomach, like he just shattered a Molotov cocktail inside me. Then abruptly breaks the kiss and settles himself back against the glass, proudly smiling at how hot he’s gotten me. I furrow my brows and pout. 

“Didn’t you just say it was you who wanted to please me?”

I bit my pouted lip and nod. He reaches out his hand.

“Take my hand,” he says, his voice is both soft and firm order. 

I take his hand, and he wraps it around his cock, which pulses at my touch. He leads my hand very slowly up and down his shaft, as it grows harder with each pump. 

“Tell me, how much do you know about this?”

“I…I’ve actually read a lot on sex, despite not participating,” I say, bashfully.

“As suspected, I want you to show me what you know, with occasional ques from me, and I’ll be sure to show you if I’m pleased,” he says. 

He releases my hand, leaving me to my own devices though his dark eyes intently still watch me. I grip just a little harder on him and stroke little more vigorously. He gives me a slight smile, a subtle signal he approves but with the expectation of more. I lick my lips and slides the tip of my tongue from the base of his cock ever so purposefully and slowly up to his head. It pulses again and gets harder. He tastes just a tad salty, and like the smell of rain. A half moan, half chuckle seeps from Lucifer’s mouth. I grin with pride, this feels easier than when I went down on Maze, which makes sense, more simple anatomy to work with. I use my tongue again, this time from up to down and past the base to his balls. 

“Mmmm,” he groans, as I give one a courteous squeeze and lap the other slowly. 

I bring my tongue back up to the head, and circle around it, all while locking my eyes to his. Keep going back and forth with circling his head, and slither down to the base till he’s lathered in saliva. Then, I take him into my mouth, tongue out and upper lips curled over my teeth. He grows harder. Bigger. Pulsing. It gets me wet.

“Oh, that’s it,” he hums.

I take him in as much as I can without gagging, my hand gripping what’s left that my mouth can’t reach. Deepthroating is a run, and I’m still learning to walk. Pull out, slowly, trying not to smile as I’m reminded of how the other night, he fucked me so slowly for ages till I begged for more. Payback time. I moan as I suck his cock, and it makes him twitch. 

“What a naughty bookworm you are,” he pants, fingers run through my hair.

I laugh, and he twitches again. But he smiles down at me, like he’s amused by my efforts. Is he challenging me? I suck harder, and grip just a little tighter. He leans his head back, with a deep inhale and exhale as I pull out. I, hm watching him enjoy this is getting me off. My other hand sneaks between my legs to sooth my arousal down a bit. Oh, I’m wetter than I realized. Damn, my lips are aching from being curled back, not sure I can keep this up. 

“Getting tired down?” he asks.

I don’t look into his eye as I moan a “no” or try to, I’ve got a mouth full at the moment. It’s a lie, this is hurting my lips, but I want to keep going. Lucifer firmly grasps his fingers at the roots of my hair, it doesn’t hurt, and he pulls my head back till his dick’s out of my mouth. The way he handled me, controlling me by my hair, it’s kind of hot.

“I know when someone is lying to me, Little Lamb,” he muses, still with a clever smile on his face.

He let’s go of my hair and combs it back tenderly. 

“Being an overachiever is great and all, but not at your personal expense. Alright?” he says, voice sweet yet stern.

“Yes Lucifer,” I say, with a slight pout of my lips. 

“Good, now let me reward your efforts,” he orders, taking my arms and pulling me up to guide me to his lap. 

I stand up, and climb up on top of him, straddling him. His hard cock sticks out between our stomachs. He kisses, licks, and nibbles from my neck to my breasts, while his hands massage my ass. 

“No marks other people can see please,” I murmur.

“As you desire,” he whispers, between nips on my breasts. 

I’m disappointed I wasn’t very successful at my first blowjob attempt, though I guess I can’t be a natural at everything on the first try. That would be silly. 

Lucifer slips a hand between my legs, opening my lips with his finger, and stroking from my opening to my clit teasingly. I shiver at the sensation, I’m dripping onto his finger. He won’t insert it inside, and only barely grazes my clit. Keeps at this for far too long, torturing me again. One day. One day I will have my revenge, and torture him like this as well. I whimper, I need more. Finally he penetrates me, and uses his thumb on my clit. Some relief! I rock my hips to the rhythm of his finger, gasping with each pulse of pleasure it brings me. Another finger, oooh I love being filled. 

He reaches over to the wall at his right, and opens a small glass compartment, and takes out a condom. I suspect he has condoms hidden in nearly every nook and cranny here. He hands me the condom, seeing as how his other hand is busy, I guess he wants me to put it on for him. I carefully tear open the wrapper and take out the condom. It looks like a tiny hat. Ok I remember I must pinch the tip a little to leave room for semen to collect, so I do that. 

“Wait,” he says, taking his finger out of me, pulls back his foreskin, and lathers my juices on his tip before letting me place the condom on top.

Then I carefully unroll it down his shaft to the base. I slip my fingers inside myself and out to further lather over the condom. Lucifer then holds my hips and pulls me upward so I hover over his cock. 

“Like before, tell me if anything hurts,” He says. 

“I will.”

He lowers me down, it feels a little different from last time, this angle puts pressure at different spots. Again, no pain. Just stretching and there is less discomfort from last time too. I hold still with him all the way inside me, as he patiently waits and tenderly rubs my thighs. 

This is just sex. No love. Just lust. Yet he doesn’t treat me like how I thought casual sex would be, not that I thought he’d treat me like complete garbage…still I also didn’t imagine a casual lover would be this considerate. All other men I’d come close to being intimate with were at least some degree of impatient, frustrated…pushy. Maybe I’ve just had a real bad string of men in my life? Now here I am with a man that calls himself Lucifer, after the very Devil himself, we barely know each other, and he’s treating me better than most men have. Is it a bad string of men, or are not enough men just not held to high standards, or is this just decency?

I lift myself up, pulling him out of me to the tip, and then slowly back in. The moans we release together are just as long and slow on the way down. I love hearing him moan! I thrust again, ah so good! Again, and again. Being in control of the pace is great, I can’t get enough! 

“Arch back, and use my knees to hold steady,” he pants.

I lean back, brace my hands to his knees as I thrust more vigorously. 

“Mah! Oh God! “I squeal, as his cock hits my front walls, right on my G-spot. 

He keeps his hands on my hips, moans and grunts as I fuck him. I can’t contain my movements, I need to cum! I thrust harder, moan louder as I ecstasy takes me higher and higher. Lucifer move a hand to touch my clit, making circle motions against it. My eyes roll back, I’m so close. 

“Ah, fuck,” Lucifer gasps.

At last, I quake as my orgasm bursts inside me. But I thrust through it, trying to bring Lucifer over too. He grabs me about the waist and holds me tight as he thrusts upward into me at a breakneck pace.

“Yes! Hah, ahhhh!” he gasps, as he cums.

A couple more pumps inside me before he pulls out, and his grip around me loosens. Me? I’m just limp, as I pant into his ear. His fingers run through my hair, and his lips peck my cheek. We stay like that for maybe a couple minutes, before we stand up and step out of the show. Lucifer lets me lean on him as I walk, my legs are a bit wobbly. My eyes sting a little as they adjust to the return of light, and shiver in the cool air. 

“Here,” he says, wrapping a fluffy towel around me and then handing me a second one for my hair. 

We dry off, Lucifer throws away the condom we used, and we leave the bathroom, both wearing silk robes that feel so nice against skin.

“Have a seat, I’ll get us some drinks. You like whiskey?” 

“Not really, have any wine?” I ask, curling myself in a corner of the couch.  
He opens a cupboard beneath his glowing bar, revealing a lovely wine set. 

“White or red?” he asks.

“White, I prefer my alcohol sweet.”

He pours us both a glass and joins me on the leather couch. I sip my wine and let it pool on my tongue to savor before I swallow, it’s perfectly sweet as I like it. 

“So, tell me. How is it I haven’t heard of you? A talented and beautiful dancer as you should be a star.”

I can feel the blood rush to my cheeks at his question, not sure how to answer that. Surely, he understands a woman my size, regardless of skill isn’t exactly what LA would consider star material? As for beautiful…I’m pretty enough, but again not by conventional standards (least not enough) and especially in this city. Might as well be blunt about it.

I sigh,” Do you see many stars my size? Adele maybe, and only when she started getting noticed.”

“Ah, I see. I have trouble remembering which body shape is the current standard. It’s ridiculous, the only consistency through the ages has been symmetry and I find that limiting as well frankly. “he exclaims, then drinks his wine.

“Huh, must also be easy to forget when you meet the current standard,” I say, with a raised eyebrow and then take another sip.

“Are you calling me out Little Lamb?”

“Yes,” I muse.

“Touché, though still I surely you’ve had a little success in the dance world?” he asks, with his eyes locked to mine.

“I have, but that was some time ago. I was smaller than.”

“Oh?”

“A few years ago, I was part of a dance troupe called The Step Sprites,” I explain.

“The Step Sprites? I’ve heard of them, they’ve been in a few big-name music videos and are about to go on tour.”

“Yeah, I manage to be in one music video you can see me I a couple clips of it briefly in the background. I was smaller at the time. My hair was dyed purple too. We were just starting to get noticed.”

“So, what happened?” he asks, scooting close to me.

“I got sick, real sick. In here,” I say, lightly taping my temple.

“Tumor?” he says, with a tilt of his head.

“Oh, no. Clinical depression. It was bad, really bad. I had to go to the hospital and stay there for a while to…stabilize. There was a lot of trial and error, long enough that I needed to leave the troupe for a whole year. They told me I’d be welcomed back anytime.” I say all this with an unsubtle shake of my head, as the memories replay in my head like a film real. 

“And when you were better enough to come back?”

“I was about sixty pounds heavier.”

“And they suddenly weren’t so welcoming.” He says, with an understanding nod.

“I was already considered the curvy one before. They told me I needed to lose the weight and I tried, I tried so damn had. Diet after diet, a “lifestyle change”. I did lose some, but it all triggered the same type of thinking that doesn’t do anything for my mental health.” 

“You relapsed?”

“Hard. And so my membership was officially revoked. And I lost another year of my life to putting myself back together again.” I explain, and gulp down the rest of my drink. 

“You haven’t had any luck finding work in dance since?”

“A couple gigs here and there, I was in a “body positivity” commercial, advertising protein bars. But I was put in the background and most sequences with me dancing were cut. I was the only actually fat girl in the cast.”

“Protein Slim Bars?”

Shit, he’s seen it. I break eye contact, looking down at the floor in shame. I detest that condescending commercial. Need more wine.

“I needed the money,” I exclaim, as I get up and go back to the bar to refill my glass.

“How do you get by?”

“I work retail lately, along with private dance lessons. Most of my clients are kids. Plus my mother pays half my rent.” I our the wine into my glass.

“Oh NO! That is awful!”

“What retail or the kids?”

“Children of course!”

I snicker,” honestly, the kids are better behaved than most of my customers.”

“Really? Ugh, we’re getting sidetracked here. Look, I’d like to help you with your career. I know people that could give you an in and owe me favors, I can introduce you.”

I nearly spill over the edge of my glass, caught off guard by his proposal. He can’t be serious? Than again, I remember the first night we met, and his comments about making sure the guy that harassed me was banned from every bar and club in LA. He’d have to know the right people to have that kind of reach, so he could plausibly get me back into the industry. 

“Are you pulling my leg?” I say, eye him suspiciously.

“Never! I never pull anything, except hair,” he chuckles, with a wink. 

“But, why? Why do you want to help me?” I ask, stepping back to the couch, standing in front of him.

“Like I said Lamb, you should be a star.” He says, as he reaches a hand around my calf and up my thigh. 

The warmth of his fingers delicately on my skin moves likes splashes up my leg to my head. His touch is like magic, god everything with him was like magic. How did this happen? It’s like something out of escapist fiction! And that makes me the heroine? It’s been so long since my life felt like my own story, instead of the best friend or the cautionary tale. He pulls me closer to him, lifting my leg so it was bent and nestle on his lap. I reach over the side to put down my glass. Giggle as he kisses my thigh and his fingers tickle my butt.

“You really believe I have what it takes?” I say, getting breathy by his kisses and touch.

“Yes, I don’t lie.”

“Bah!” I gasp, as he suddenly pulls me down onto the couch and is on top of me. He laughs, and I laugh along with him, it’s so easy to laugh with him.

“Trust me” he whispers, move down my neck with kisses.

I slip my hands into his robe and over his firm warm chest. I trust him, I don’t know why, yes he’s been a generous and considerate lover, but ultimately still a stranger. This handsome stranger now offers me everything, and somehow, I know he’ll actually give it to me.

“I trust you Lucifer.”


	6. Unhappy Birthday & Whiskey (no smut)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a second passionate night with Lucifer, Rachel is confronted with a traumatic memory from her past as she sleeps.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *****CONTENT WARNING: The following chapter contains emotional manipulation, fat shaming, heavily intoxicated characters, mixing medication with alcohol, internalized victim blaming, and sexual assault. *****

I’ve always known when I’m dreaming, sometimes I can control my dreams. Not just my actions but the whole world around me. This dream though…this dream is not like that. I’m aware of what’s happening, this is a memory from a little less than a year ago. A terrible memory I don’t want to be in.

It is, or was my 28th birthday, and Tom had taken me out to a bar to celebrate. He was being sweet, his fingers interlocked with mine and he kissed my cheek. I smiled and kissed his cheek in return, just as I did when it happened in real time. Inside…inside I’m recoiling like a nervous snake. I know all that happens this night.

We enter the bar, and my eyes look around for my best friend Nia and former sprite sister, whose supposed to be meeting us there. At a table in the far corner opposite us I see her, with two other sprites Erika and Sophie. Oh, oh no. Nia mouths, “I’m sorry” while the other two wave enthuastically. I turn to him with my eyebrows arched up and blink in bewilderment.

“What?”

“Why are Erika and Sophie here?”

“I invited them.”

“I, Tom I told you I didn’t want them-“

“Come on Rache, you can’t keep avoiding them. They miss you.”

Miss me? They never visited me when I was hospitalized, and the second time they didn’t even send a card or even called. Didn’t protest at all when I got my Sprite wings clipped either. Nia did, she was with me through it all, and nearly cut off her own wings. But I had convinced her not to, just because my career was ruined-er I mean held back-doesn’t mean hers should be either. 

“So, you spring them on me?!”

“Look, it’s one night. You don’t have to fucking see them again after.”

I stare at him, I wish I couldn’t believe he pulled this stunt. But my feelings, my wants, and my needs never mattered to Shitbag whenever he thought he knew better. I took a deep breath.

“Fine.” I say, through gritted teeth and then march across the room to Nia and the other two.

I put on a perfect fake smile for them as I join them at the table, with my arms stretched out for hugs.

“Oh my god! I haven’t seen you in forever!” I cheer, hugging each of them.

“I know! We’ve missed you so much! Happy Birthday!” said Erika, as she wrapped her arms around me.

Her eyes looked me up and down, as I step out of the hug. The look on her face upon seeing my body said it all. Just kill me now, I remember thinking when I saw that expression of pity. 

“Your…skin is so clear!” 

I wanted to say, “Yeah! It’d be so terrible to be fat AND have bad skin right!?” to make her as uncomfortable as I am. But instead I kept faking it.

“Aw thank you!” I said, hand on my cheek like I’m genuinely flattered.

Next, is Sophie. She at least didn’t examine me or try to compliment me on anything other than my body. 

When I hugged Nia, she discreetly whispered into my ear,” I tried to convince them not to come.”

I nod, I already knew Nia wouldn’t have pulled this crap. Time blurs through Tom sitting with us, getting drinks and food, as dreams tend to fast forward through irrelevant things. 

“Tom told us you auditioned for the Protein Slim commercial? Did you get a call back?” Nia asked.

“Oh yeah, about a couple days ago. I’m up for another audition round, and then they’ll decide on the cast.” I explained.

“That’s great! I love Protein Slim! They taste great, and I love the body positive message of their branding!” said Sophie.

Yeah, a product with the word “slim” is totally body positive and not just using the movement to seem inclusive in order to boost profits. Not that I have room to talk, I auditioned for the commercial after all. I needed the money, and…really wanted to stop hearing jokes about not being a “real” dancer anymore cause I can’t get gigs. 

“I recently ate nothing but those for a week and lost 5 pounds! Just in time for our latest video collab! “Erika declared, proudly. 

I wanted to talk about ANYTHING else than about my body and diets when I lived through this conversation the first time. My sentiments are exactly the same this second time around! 

“What about you Rachel? You try em?” asked Sophie.

I take a sip of my second drink of the night and shake my head. Nia is quietly watching the conversation, I can sensed her discomfort the way only best friends can pick up on each other’s hidden feelings.

“She gave the whole stockpile they gifted her to me, a whole year supply.” said Tom.

“What? Why?” said Erika.

“Because-“ Tom said, but I’m not going to let him finish.

“I just didn’t like the way they tasted. Anyway, Tom told me you already got another collab coming up?” I interrupted.

“Oh yeah! Sia wants us to dance along side her little dancer sidekick!” said Sophie. 

I already knew this, from both Tom and Nia but I was desperate to change the subject here. Another fast forward through Erika and Sophie gabbing with excitement, and about another two rounds of drinks. Well two more rounds for all them, I was on my fifth at that point. Oh yeah, and Tom wasn’t drinking as he was my ride home. I didn’t want to remember this birthday by tomorrow. A couple people approached our table.

“Um, excuse us. Are you guys…are you guys part of the Step Sprites?”

“Yeah! You want an autograph?” asked Erika, a loud ring of cheer in her voice. 

“Yes thank you!” 

Erika took out a pen from her clutch and uses a napkin to write on. Asked for the fans’ names, wrote them a nice little message, and then signed it with both her real name and Sprite name. She passed it around the table for the others to sign as well. When they’d all finished it says:

Thank you for loving us Amy and Cathy, we couldn’t dance without you!  
Spicy Sprite, Erika  
Icy Sprite, Sophie  
Steely Sprite, Thomas  
Shy Sprite, Nia

I didn’t want to be jealous. I was happy for Tom and Nia, really, I was. But at the same time it was really fucking hard not to catastrophize that I’d never get another chance like I did as Fiery Sprite. The two fans hadn’t even noticed me, they thanked everyone else and returned to rest of crowd in the bar. Then…then I felt fear, because I remember we’re leaving the bar soon and I can only watch helplessly. 

Fast forward through my last drink, some closing conversations, and hugged everyone good bye. Then I stumbled out of the bar, as Tom steadied me with his arm. No. No I don’t want to go with him. You idiot leave with Nia!

“Good night guys! Happy Birthday again Rache!” hollered our friends, going the opposite way to their waiting ubers. 

“Thank youuu!” I call out to them, waving and laughing as Tom steers me to his car. I had blown a kiss to Nia, which she returned. Don’t leave me here Nia! Please! Offer to take me home instead! 

“Baby, you are absolutely plastered,” he chuckled, kissing my forehead. 

“I am nawt!” I protested and proceeded to nearly fall onto the pavement.

Tom braced himself just in time to hold himself up and kept me from falling flat on my face. 

“Easy!” he said.

I feel my throat is aching, like I’m crying yet that’s not what’s happening. On the outside I was laughing with relief to finally be free of Erika and Sophie’s presence. I want to wake up. Please God, let me wake up. The last fast forward through the car ride home, and Tom tugging me along to my apartment. He got in with the key I’d given him, led me in to my bed room, and laid me onto my bed. 

“What a fucking night!” I sighed.

Tom was oblivious to my actual meaning,” Yeah, that was something! Aren’t you glad I invited them!”

He unbuckled the straps of my heels, and slipped them off. I remember…thinking he was being so sweet at the moment, taking care of me when I’m so drunk, and feeling like I couldn’t tell him my real feelings cause it’d ruin his mood. Fucking shitbag. The ache in my throat is worse, and I feel hot tears streaming down my cheeks that aren’t there. Am I crying in my sleep? He smiled as he took off my second shoes and tossed it to the floor, then he sat closer, so he was leaning over me. No. No. NO! 

“I love you Rachel,” He said and kissed my lips. 

I’m suddenly not in my body anymore, and now I’m watching a few feet away from the bed. Tommy, please don’t go any further! Don’t do what you did! He kissed me again and again, his hand moved to feel my curly red hair. I kissed him back, but I’m so drunk and exhausted I’m struggling to keep my eyes open. My body was already going limp as sleep called to me.

“Hmmm I’m tired baby, I should go to sleep. I’m gonna be so hung over by tomorrow.” I said, turning to my side away from him. 

And that was the moment I sort of half passed out, couldn’t move, and still just awake enough to be aware of what was happening around me. To my horror. Shitbag lays onto the behind from behind me, spooning me up against him, and his arm wrapped around me. When he did this, I had thought, oh he wants to cuddle me till I’m asleep, oh how sweet…no that’s not what he wanted. He kisses my neck

“Baby, I’m tired,” I moan.

His hand on my stomach moves to the curve of my waist, fingers trace over side rolls, and down to my hip. The present me, watching turns away and tries to hide myself in the corner. I don’t want to see this! I don’t need to see this! I press my hands against my ears and close my eyes.

“Doesn’t this feel nice?” he whispered. 

I can hear every word perfectly despite covering my ears, and simultaneously feel his hands still roaming on me. Stop touching me! I didn’t want you touching me! I still don’t want you touching me! I can’t move, and I told you I wanted to sleep! Why did you keep going!? You said you loved me!? I scream, I scream with all my might, and slam my fists to my wall! WAKE UP! WAKE UP! 

 

I jolt upright in bed like I’ve been drowning, and just now made it to the surface for air. My whole body is drenched in sweat and, my arms tremble as I try to hold myself together. It was just a dream. It was just a dream! It happened a while ago, I can handle a bad dream! I flinch and gasp as a hand touches my shoulder. 

I turn to see Lucifer…right, I stayed the night with him in the penthouse. His dark eyes are filled with confusion and concern, but I swiftly turn from his gaze. His gaze has an effect on me and I can’t let him see into me right now. It’s my business. My baggage. I haven’t even told Dr. Martin about that night. Hell, I’d almost forgotten all about it. Like I’d put it away in a box, and hid it in storage, but now it’d suddenly fallen off the tower of boxes where I’d left it. Popped right open and spilling everywhere in a big mess. 

“Alright Lamb?” 

I can’t answer him, not to give him the silent treatment, I mean I literally can’t form words right now. All I can think to do it tighten every muscle in my body, and hold onto that tightness for as long as I can. One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Release. As my body starts to relax, my arms tremble a little less. I tighten up again. One. Two. Three. Four. Release. Wheeeeew. There is just a little tremor here and there, I can speak at last.

“I’m alright.” I say, scooting to side and plopping my feet to the floor. 

“You…you were crying in your sleep. I tried to wake you.”

“I’m fine, what time is it?”

“The sun is just starting to rise.”

I look up out at the window wall, and smile at the comforting light purple in the sky. An outreached hand of soft magenta rising where the sun will soon peak it’s head out on the horizon. I stand up, and walk out of the room, through the living area, grabbing and slipping on the silk robe left on the couch as I walk out into the balcony. The morning spring hair wakes me further up, putting the nightmare farther away from my mind. I’m not sure how many minutes go by when Lucifer comes to my side, in his robe, and two glasses of whiskey in his hands.

“Something to take off the edge?” he asks, offering me a drink.

I take it immediately, I know I shouldn’t drink to deal with my problems but at this moment don’t give two shits about it. Oh! My meds! I quickly head back inside, grab my purse from the bar where I left it when I got here, and back to the balcony. I take out my daily dose of bupropion, I made sure to have it so I could take it first thing when I woke up and not have to take it when I get home later. Brought a tooth brush, and a change of panties too.

“Oooh, what lovely candies do you have there?” Lucifer inquires, looking hungrily at my pills as I take out 10mg for myself.

I’ve seen him drinking first thing in the morning twice now, so naturally he other forms of intoxication. 

“These are prescribed to me, the usual way I take the edge off. Though minus the alcohol. And no, you can’t have any. ” 

He pouts, like a child being refused his favorite sweets. 

“You forget I already work with children Lucifer.”

“Very well Little Lamb.” 

“I’ve been meaning to ask, why do you call me that? Little Lamb?”

“Well for starters, you’re adorably short. Secondly, do you know the meaning of your name Rachel?”

“I know it’s a Biblical name, there are a few different Rachel’s in the bible. The most significant one being Jacob’s first wife, she’s often referred to as the Mother of the Israelites?” I say, remembering some of my Catholic school bible lessons.

“Yes, but its exact meaning is ewe, a female sheep, or lamb. Or in some versions, specifically a lamb of God.”

I chuckle at the thought, as I take my meds, followed by a sip of whiskey. “As I recall, bad things tend to happen to lambs in the Bible. Sacrificed a whole lot in the name of God?”

“Very true, but no need to worry with me. I’ve never cared for senseless slaughter in his or my name.”

It’s really starting to hit me how committed he is to this Devil persona he’s cultivated, though I’ve met my fair share of eccentric people since living in LA. Though he doesn’t seem like a method actor, they’re usually completely insufferable. Ok not all, I’ve met some lovely method actors who manage to not treat people around them like shit and excuse their own behavior as being “in character”. I don’t really know this man that calls himself Lucifer though, we’ve just fucked a few times. Maybe he is insufferable, and I just haven’t seen that side of him? 

“What’s up with the whole Lucifer thing?” I ask.

“Not a thing dear, just my name. I really am the Devil.” He exclaims and takes a sip of whiskey.

I look at him, a bit baffled. If this is a performance, he should get an award. Know what? I feel like playing along, should be an interesting way to pick his brain. 

“Why would the Devil be hanging out in LA, running a nightclub of all things?” 

“Oh well, why wouldn’t I?”

“Does he have a job to do, somewhere a bit warmer?”

“I’m right here, no need to discuss me in the third person. As for your question it’s simple, I was sick of punishing the damned and decided I deserved a vacation. A long one.”

“Then who’s doing the punishing without you?”

“Well there are plenty of demons left down there, though honestly most those damned souls are perfectly good at punishing themselves all on their own. Maze was the best of them, torturer, I mean.”

I blink, Maze is in on this too? A collaborative performance as the Devil and his demon? Well…I don’t know what to say to that really. I take another swig of whiskey. Am I really going to let this guy help with my career? Yeah, he certainly has money, but what if he’s not actually connected to anyone important? No, he must be in even a small way to have a successful nightclub like LUX. 

“A vacation where you help down on their luck dancers?”

“Not just dancers, anyone I like really. You’re not the first.”

“Really? Whose career have you helped in?”

“You’ve heard of the popstar Delilah? She started her singing career here at LUX, till I introduced her to the right people. Or maybe the artist Benny Choi? ”

Those are both recognizable names, but still no evidence that he genuinely knows them. 

“Prove it.” I say, with a smile.

“Alright, let me just call one of them right now.” He says, taking his cell out of his robe pocket. 

He dials and hits the button for facetime. Within a few rings the recognizable face of singer Delilah pops up on the phone screen, with her blonde hair, thin face, and cool green eyes. She’s got her hair put up in a ponytail and dressed in gym clothes, looks like she may be using a standing bike. My goodness, he really does know her.

“Hey Lucifer! What’s up?” she says, her breath a little heavy as she’s still working out while on the phone.

“Delilah darling, I got a potential new prodigy with me. This is Rachel, she’s wondering if I can really help her with her career.” 

“Hi Rachel, you don’t have to worry about Lucifer. He will hook you up, it’s the other people in the business you should worry about.” She explains. 

“Thank you darling, we should catch up sometime.” Says Lucifer.

“Yeah, I’ll let you know when my schedule is free! I gotta go here though, weight training is next! Byyye!” she says, before hanging up.

“There, you see?” he states, turning off his phone and tucking it back in his pocket.

“Wow…did you sleep with her too?” I ask. 

“What? No, she used to work here, and I don’t sleep with my employees.” He says. 

“Except Maze?”

“Ah well, Maze is different, we have a history.” He explains.

Wait…but that history, at least as he’s telling it she still works under him. That’s still shady! I don’t know how to point that out to him, I don’t want to start a confrontation. How does Maze feel about this? Let’s just change the subject.

“So, what do you get out of helping me? What’s in it for you?” I ask, finishing the last of my whiskey glass.

“I like to see talented people thrive and having played a part in it. Like a gardener, planting deserving flowers in rich soil. Though I do have one thing, should I ever need one all I ask is a favor in return for mine.”

“What favor?”

“I don’t know, I’ll know when I need it.”

“Not my soul?”

“Haha, I have no use for people’s souls.” He chuckles. 

The sun has appeared now, the purple colors before are now swept away by rays of bright yellow, orange, and magenta.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello readers! It's been a long while since I've added another chapter to this smutty little fanfic of mine. When I started writing this I was just starting my break between my Fall & Winter semesters, so school and work have gotten in the way of me being able to make time to write for this. What little spare time I do have, has been spent working on original works.   
> Someday I will return to this, but I am unable to give you definite date of when. Thank you to everyone who read, bookmarked, or gave kudos.

**Author's Note:**

> **Feel free to critique my work I love constructive feedback!**


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